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Phone Manners We Could Use

I dislike cell phones for several reasons, mostly having to do with safety and the way people talk loudly in public places, encroaching on personal air space. But I really, really have come to abhor cordless phones — for personal reasons. However, before I share what those are, let me say that I’m somewhat biased against telephone communication to begin with, having spent much of my working life as a reporter and editor with a phone glued to my ear. My husband says it was a challenge courting over the phone, as so many couples do in the early stages of a relationship, because I was always in a hurry to hang up. What can I say?

Having disclosed that, my gripe with cordless phones concerns our over-the-top tendency as women to multitask. I get really frustrated trying to hold conversations with friends while they’re directing kids, emptying the dishwasher or clicking away on the computer. Hello?! Can we just focus here for a sec? It’s difficult being part of a three-way discourse on what chores didn’t get done and what homework needs to be finished. Please call me later, after you’ve figured it out.

Before I never, ever receive another call from a friend (after they read this), let me admit that I am a teensy-weensy bit guilty of this practice myself. The cordless phone makes it all too tempting for me to just tidy up a bit while listening to some important revelation from a friend or family member. But how rude is that? All that background noise says one thing loud and clear: We’re not really listening. It’s like trying to talk to someone at a party who keeps looking everywhere but at you. Very disconcerting.

So, one of my New Year’s resolutions (you don’t want to know out of how many) has been to cut that out. I’ve vowed to sit down and just listen when a friend calls. And if I don’t have enough time or patience to do that, I’ll be brave enough to ask if I can call her back when I can give her my full attention, which she, as my friend, most definitely deserves.

Bye for now,

Karen Reed-Matthee
Editor and Cofounder

©February 2008 Caliope Publishing Company